Since Valentine’s Day is this week, I thought it would be helpful to do a quick breakdown about what self love isn’t, what it is, and how to cultivate more of it in your life. 🙂

For a lot of us, when we think about self-love, images of bubble baths, candles, and a quiet evening of “me time” often come to mind. While these things are definitely enjoyable, self-love is so much more than self-care or maintenance.

Because, when we think of self-love in these terms, we do ourselves a disservice. Basic self-care is not a replacement for the real love we deserve to experience not only from others, but from ourselves. 

At its core, true self-love is about having the audacity, courage, and decision to fully embrace and express who you truly are. It’s honoring your uniqueness, your desires, and vision for yourself and your life. 

The most loving thing you can do for yourself is give yourself permission to be 100% authentic. 

Here’s how to start making that shift:

3 Tips to Create Self-Love and Be Authentically YOU

Tip #1: Get Curious

The first step in cultivating self-love is getting curious about who you are and what you truly desire. Start by asking yourself, “What would I love?” 

Think about the person you want to be, the way you want to express yourself, and the experiences you want to have. Dive deep into your heart and mind—what makes you feel alive, excited, or truly at peace? 

This isn’t about what others want or expect from you, but about discovering your own passions, values, and desires. Let this curiosity guide you toward a deeper understanding of what lights you up!

Tip #2: Embrace Your Desires

Once you’ve uncovered your desires, it’s time to embrace them fully. Picture yourself in vivid detail doing the things that bring you joy. Imagine a moment where you are living fully, doing what you love, and completely at ease in your authentic self. 

What does that look like? What are you doing? Who are you with? How does it feel? Immerse yourself in the sensation of being truly YOU, living out your desires without fear or hesitation. 

This practice helps to align your energy with the life you want to create, and the more you do it, the more you’ll begin to believe that you are worthy of it all.

Tip #3: Give Yourself Respect

Self-love isn’t just about feeling good in the moment—it’s also about taking actionable steps toward your dreams. Make your desires a priority and treat them with the same respect you’d give to any important meeting or commitment. 

Put them on your calendar. Set aside time to work toward what you want. Just like you wouldn’t cancel on a colleague or miss an appointment for your child’s soccer game, don’t cancel on yourself. Treat your dreams with the same dedication and commitment, and watch how your self-respect grows.

True self-love isn’t about fleeting moments of indulgence—it’s about living in alignment with who you really are. When you give yourself permission to be fully authentic, you’ll find that love for yourself blooms naturally. 

So get curious, embrace your desires, and show yourself the respect you deserve. 

You’ve got this!